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A random selection of fabulous
quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
100,000 famous quotes.
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Random Funny Quotes - 175
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Thomas Jefferson
When a man assumes a public trust, he should consider himself as public property
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Anonymous
It is light grief that can take counsel.
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Philip James Bailey
It matters not how long we live but how.
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Margaret Fuller
A house is no home unless it contains food and fire for the mind as well as the body.
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James Madison
A popular government without popular information or the means of acquiring it, is but a Prologue to Farce, or a Tragedy, or perhaps both. Knowledge will forever govern ignorance. and a people who mean to be their own Governors, must arm themselves with the power which knowledge gives.
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H. G. Wells
The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow.
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Barbara Friedman
It is very important to make sure the person you're marrying is like minded. It's crucial for a couple to have shared goals and values. The more you have in common the less you have to argue about.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait. Not me, you.
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Abraham Lincoln
No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
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J. Michael Straczynski
Never follow somebody else's path it doesn't work the same way twice for anyone...the path follows you and rolls up behind you as you walk, forcing the next person to find their own way.
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W. Somerset Maugham
You are not angry with people when you laugh at them. Humor teaches them tolerance.
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Unknown
A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
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